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Saturday, December 10, 2005

Ryan's Magnum P.I. Opus

ryan fitzpatrick took an off-the-cuff joke/remark to heart and composed a series of 8 sonnets with the help of some electronic poetry generator, a touching tribute entitled: "Fuck You, Jonathan Ball." though largely repetitive gibberish, the poems are fairly clever in parts and contain some great lines like the following:

But, that apple juice held no answers

So if you like offensive and odd poems, you'll enjoy the following series, posted for the debasement of all.


Fuck You, Jonathan Ball

by The Leevi Lehto Google Sonnet Engine w/ assistance from ryan fitzpatrick


i.


Buchanan and Bill Press. In return
have lost bass player Jon Ball but they say
standing on what we can prove, I say
TONIGHT, HE COMES! No it's not a porn

were in that robot movie: Fisher Stevens
Doing whatever the fuck you can to stay
- Could move to his left for the double-play
*blech* I dunno how widespread the popcorn

they say - But, heck, anyone would
I'ma dawg bitch You ain't in
dawg bitch You ain't in love with

me with such absolute hatred, told
2003 by Jonathan Lethem - Pikmin
he's so gaddamn - Fred: What´s up with


ii.


YOU' written on it," spits mad
fuck you pull up your own skirt, skirt
of Bentonville ball-lickery is part
Man, fuck you son! I'm glad

should we ask Jon Ball's dad
where she dropped the ball, Jon Stewart
after the last transit, in 1882, Robert
- War and Peace Vol 2. Fuck Dyin' - Head

for writing something? - Oddly enough
easy, you're wrong. I don't
But, that apple juice held no answers

ass. - Play something other than high
Jonathan Ball Altadena. The prank is so
rode in on. Luckily, the Stage Deli delivers


iii.


you will never try Fuck you hoes cause
8 Ball I'ma dawg bitch You ain't in
know very much about the Coalition
no showing - "As soon as those

and I want your mother out of my house
shocked and awed by how the dems have been
-The most discernable lines in
heap of shit" and - Because

YOU' written on it," spits mad
Tongue' shit? Jon: All I needed
you will never try Fuck you hoes

Man, fuck you son! I'm glad
- Fuck you looking at? Dylan wanted
Fuck you! Jonathan jumps up and dresses



iv.


but they say - But, heck, anyone would
dawg bitch You ain't in love
is Jewish for anti-biotic. - white Give
at me with such absolute hatred, told

off As for the example,poor choice, should
shocked and awed by how the dems have
know, carry my duffel - Could move
to, you know, carry my duffel - Could

that they would make absolutely fucking
months, the Manitoban has been the centre
original lyric's sheet) Jon: Look at

from sitting at the Jonathan. 24 Jul
Dylan wanted to shriek at Arthur Lomb, before
Martian Press Review, -Your comment


v.


sophmore chick who And don't you think
you will never try Fuck you hoes
- Jonathan Ball Altadena. The prank
- Fuck you! Jonathan jumps up and dresses

material from this site for purposes
YOU' written on it," spits mad
fuck up. -The most discernable lines
Man, fuck you son! I'm glad

choice, should we ask Jon Ball's dad
in the subject heading. - How
and Peace Vol 2. Fuck Dyin' - Head
suggests that you also don't know

- "It's a ball,"
East Coast cats are tied up in beef


vi.


a Gypsy into a crystal ball. But, that apple
shit? Jon: All I needed was
"Fuck you bitch about your little
is so good, I'm wondering if it was

want the ball and FUCK YOU!" If it was
to - "Our music is one straight
Other. Nobody Like You - Jonathan as
From the Hardcover edition.Copyright

examples) - You also probably thought
the Manitoban has been the centre
that time, the same one that brought
Dylan wanted to shriek at Arthur Lomb, before

I'ma dawg bitch You ain't in love
is Jewish for anti-biotic. - white Give


vii.


But, that apple juice held no answers
to punch him and said 'Fuck you go
Donahue called me a fuck. I told him to go
rode in on. Luckily, the Stage Deli delivers

you. I've been moving to snapped fingers
FUCK YOU!" If it was me, I'd go
I know what I saw. “Why don’t you just go
the fuck up! Ball, of Da Muzicianz clears

loads of it. see you in vegas. (confidential
have lost bass player Jon Ball but they say
Jon: Look at you fool, I'm gonna fuck

pull the -There was another mechanical
standing on what we can prove, I say
a fucking miracle. So get the stick


viii.


ain't in love with me at all And
twice, - 8 Ball I'ma dawg bitch
that you also don't know very much
don't you try shutting the fuck up and

wants to hear, "I want the ball and
nigga, fuck you Cause I'm that bitch
Master P, Three 6 Mafia, Twizitd, Tech
to jump all over the spinning arms around

I'ma dawg bitch You ain't in love
(confidential information: jon ball bass
on it" spat drummer Since

Jewish for anti-biotic. - white Give
dodge ball in Mr. Latzke’s gym class
me? No problem. - Jonnis,just face

6 Comments:

Blogger ryan said...

All I did was cut and paste. I only facilitated the poems. Love, ryan.

10:37 PM

 
Blogger ryan said...

I hate ryan fitzpatrick. What a douchebag. I wrote these sonnets to say how much I hate him.

- The Leevi Lehto Google Sonnet Engine

-------

Fuck You, ryan fitzpatrick


i.


It's official: Eddie Brill can lay
the opposition and education stakeholders
the new generation of roots-rockers
roots-rockers like Ryan - I say

since moved OH fuck, i gotta say
- attracted the attention of producers
- This is the first of the quest speakers
at you. Fuck the amendment crap. I say

official: Eddie Brill can lay
Canada Fuck you spammers! So I wake up and
the opposition and education stakeholders

of roots-rockers like Ryan - I say
Fitzpatrick, who had formerly sung and
the new generation of roots-rockers


ii.


Try your search again onBut still, I think
it - It is not meant for the weak hearted
believe 'em when they Recorded
- I have to send out a gracious thank

/br /I like to think
“Fuck off Ryan” you brieflystarted
Posted
That's Eddy Two-Rivers. You think

- Ryan Fitzpatrick overlap Drew
official: Eddie Brill can lay
this Gregory Corso-like attitude

as anything you've heard from the new
of roots-rockers like Ryan - I say
to stand on your head and read upside

iii.


you talking about? - Fuck those
are you talking about? - Fuck those
And you can bet that Fitzpatrick will oppose
And you can bet that Fitzpatrick will oppose

of its litter but dont bag on Texas because
litter but dont bag on Texas because
fucking chelsea fans - - Because
fucking chelsea fans - - Because

fuck are you talking about? - Fuck those
I believe the Charger fans here will
thing in the world- and you're

you can bet that Fitzpatrick will oppose
And you can bet that Fitzpatrick will
written on her forehead so I – are


iv.


to The Line of - Johnny Ryan. Write
Lady Sovereign doesn't care one
a technology that allows you to simulate
Posted by Adam Fitzpatrick on June

So what do - The icarus line
My Bitch. nickthetick99's Avatar
Posted on: Monday, June
I think that anyone who is against this war

I mean, those who were there to hear
from Harvard, Ryan Fitzpatrick, would
Closer To A World Below (when you hear
beginning to think Ryan North should

Lady Sovereign doesn't care one
for? Posted by Adam Fitzpatrick on June




v.


important thing in the world- and you're
when you factor in how improbable
written on her forehead so I - are
Carey Meg Ryan Melissa Joan Hart Michelle

Fitzpatrick, extremely real. Trenton Doyle
It is not meant for the weak hearted
To A World Below (when you hear the title
believe 'em when they Recorded

off Ryan” you brieflystarted
the weak hearted or fucking pansy ass bitches
karenfitzpatrickbtopenworld.com Posted
one hour after Fitzpatrick announces

Harvard, Ryan Fitzpatrick, would
beginning to think Ryan North should


vi.


poetry slam on Nov 10 at 7:00pm at McNally
show! Family is the most important thing
Fitzpatrick, who had formerly sung
Fuck reviews. Reviews don't really

and my big Tony Fitzpatrick, extremely
you brieflystarted Sameunderneath Clothing
crap. I say take it to the fucking
you haven’t got anybody, relatively

- It is not meant for the weak hearted
Lady Sovereign doesn't care one
Lady Sovereign doesn't care one

believe 'em when they Recorded
for? Posted by Adam Fitzpatrick on June
for? Posted by Adam Fitzpatrick on June




vii.


acts like he is campaigning in a tight
- It is not meant for the weak hearted
believe 'em when they Recorded
want our country back! we'll fight

get the fuck away from me right
“Fuck off Ryan” you brieflystarted
Email: karenfitzpatrickbtopenworld.com Posted
Doris Henderson Nancy A. Henry she might

forced the artists to quit their
weak hearted or fucking pansy ass bitches
of a film that represents - From: Kibby

can bet that Fitzpatrick will oppose their
one hour after Fitzpatrick announces
believe 'em when they Recorded by


viii.


All you stupid mother fucking chelsea
I think if you add up the cumulative
+0000. Re: Puns (17 lines) - no idea
really matter. You can't believe

Clothing with Ryanbut have
I think if you add up the cumulative
any questions you may - You've
really matter. You can't believe

Sameunderneath Clothing with Ryanbut have
you talking about? - Fuck those
any questions you may - You've
can bet that Fitzpatrick will oppose

comments means you're over your
on in my country? You have to stand on your

---------

10:50 PM

 
Blogger sandy said...

ryan fitzpatrick tells me to fuck off all the time, but *I* don't get any poems out of it! damn you, jonathan ball!! :)

4:02 PM

 
Blogger sandy said...

btw, I thought it said 'edie brickell' somewhere in those sonnets above.

4:03 PM

 
Blogger Jonathan Ball said...

it's Eddie Brill. what does Edie Brickell have to do with anything? whereas Eddie Brill is inherently poetic.

7:17 AM

 
Blogger Nancy said...

Hilarious! I was (this makes me feel so obnoxious) "Googling" myself and found me in your Google poem.

Thanks !
Nancy A. Henry

6:07 PM

 

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